Q: My husband and I have 2 young children. The older child, our daughter, is just starting kindergarten this year.
Since my husband and I didn’t have parents who were interested in or involved in our education, we want to do a better job with our kids. But we’re not sure about what we should do to see that our kids have the best educational experiences they can. Where do we start?
A: First, kudos to you for recognizing the significance of being involved with your children’s schooling! Adults who had somewhat uninvolved parents often aren’t aware of the importance of knowing what’s going on educationally with their kids. So, having awareness and interest is truly a great way to start.
One of the initial things you might want to do is to check out the schools in the neighborhood where you live. Your goal is to find out how the public schools in your area rate in terms of standardized assessments of reading and writing abilities.
You can look up the accountability reports for the public schools in your area by searching online for the local school district. You’ll most likely spot links to statistics regarding each specific school. This will take some time and effort on your part, but it’ll be worth it. After you’ve done your research, step one is deciding on the best school for your children to attend.
Q: What about private schools? Are they really better? How do I decide between public and private school for my kids?
A: This question sparks spirited discussions across the country. And the answers to it are many and complex. Factually, the jury is still out on which provides the better education for kids: public or private schools. Some would argue that public schools provide a more “real-life” situation and expose kids to more cultures and experiences.
Many experts also say that public schools offer more special assistance and programming to meet the needs of the masses of children educated in public schools. However, others would adamantly oppose this view and argue that you get what you pay for. Those people would say parents must be willing to pay more to furnish a better education through private schooling.
Money is a big issue when it comes to private schooling. In the U.S., private schooling at the elementary level can cost anywhere from $2,500 to $40,000 per year per child.
One type of private schools is parochial, provided by church affiliations. Some offer reduced pricing to church members and for members who have more than one child in the school. So, check out your church to see if they’re affiliated with any private schools.
Also, you might want to visit the private and parochial schools in your area. Check them out in person to gather as much information as possible about their teachers’ credentials, class size, teaching methods used, and the availability of computers in the classroom. Typically, class sizes are much smaller in private and parochial schools.
To some parents, this translates to more attention given by teachers to each child. However, you must also be aware that some small private schools inter-mingle kids in several grades into the same classroom with one teacher. Depending on your child, this may or may not be the best learning environment for him.
So as you can see, the public versus private debate has strong arguments on both sides and there are many elements to consider. You and your husband can discuss these issues and make decisions based on your local school visits and research. Frankly, for many parents, private or parochial school isn’t a viable option due to the costs of such schooling.
Q: Okay. That discussion at least points me in the right direction on selecting a school. But once my kids are in school, what kinds of things should I be doing as a parent to ensure they understand the importance of school? I want them to be well-educated.
A: The good news is that parents have a great impact on how well their kids are educated and how much they learn. Plus, parents can even influence whether their kids like school or not.
Try these strategies to affect your kids’ education in positive ways:
- Each day your child attends school, cultivate a discussion on what occurred in class that day. Rather than asking, “How was your day,” or “How was school,” be more specific in your questioning.
- For example, you could ask, “What did you learn in math today?” or “Tell me one thing your teacher talked about today.” Ask open
- ended questions and encourage your child to comment.
- Demonstrate that school/homework is important by providing space in an open area of the house for the kids to do homework and read books. For younger kids, all you’ll need is a small table and chairs in the living room or family area. As kids get older and can be trusted to do their homework largely on their own, desks for their rooms are in order.
- Consistently plan time each day for the kids to read a book when they’re small or do homework as they get older. You’ll be teaching them that education is an important aspect of life whenever you behave in ways that allow time for study just like you do for baths, meals, and playtime.
- If kindergarteners and first-graders are too young to be reading, sit down with them and either read to them or listen to them practice their reading every day.
- Smile and show a relaxed mood during “study time” with your child. If a child gets tired or antsy, it’s okay to stop for a snack or even a play break for an hour or so. Just be consistent with getting in the time daily. You be the judge of when your child’s attitude or mood indicate that study time should be suspended.
- As your child matures, study time will become focused on either helping your child with homework or just occasionally dropping in to ensure the child is completing assignments.
- As early as kindergarten, share with your child, “We’re going to read for 15 minutes.” This way, kids will develop a sense of time as they mature. They’ll also learn that after they put in the time,
- it’s off for play.
- Be very cautious about providing any punishment or negative comments to your child regarding anything to do with school. You want to do everything possible to ensure your child doesn’t develop uncomfortable feelings related to school.
- Use positive words of reinforcement for your child’s efforts during study time. For example, “Your reading is getting better and better! Good job!” or “You got your homework paper done really quickly! I can see that you’re getting smarter each day because you go to school.”
- You’ll have endless opportunities to speak encouragingly about your child’s school involvement. Take advantage of them.
Q: What about bedtime and getting the kids up for school? When I was younger, we got to stay up as late as we wanted and often slept in, which made us late for school. Sometimes, we went to school with no breakfast.
A: You bring up some good points that relate indirectly to the type of education your children will receive. From the time your kids start school, establish a bedtime that fits the child and his age and allows him plenty of time for proper rest before the next school day.
Be consistent and make it clear from day one that there’s no playing around or funny stuff when it comes to staying up late on a school night. Then, in the morning, allow plenty of time for a child to wake up, have breakfast, wash up, and get dressed.
This is one of the times of day that often presents great challenges for parents (and for kids, too). So, it’s best to establish routines and set boundaries to ensure the child gets the message that today is a school day and there’s no time for the television, computer, or video games on a school day morning.
Q: My last question has to do with communicating with the school and his teacher. What’s the best way to go about it?
A: Both parents must be involved at the child’s school from time to time. Both should attend parent-teacher conferences if at all possible.
One or both parents may want to join the parent-teacher organization (PTO). This will help you become familiar with the school building, the teachers and other students, and will provide necessary support for the schools and classrooms.
These days, parents might even have nearly daily communication from their kids’ teachers via the school website and email. Respond consistently and in a timely fashion to any requests made by your kids’ teachers.
Commit to be as involved as you can with your child’s school. When teachers see parents who care, they stay on their toes where the children are concerned. And this situation ensures your kids will receive the best education possible.